210

Haven't been on the computer for a week and I swear I could've died of boredom, being stucked at this old crib. So, i suppose it's gonna do some good to this rusty blog of mine. And yes I am aware of how boring my blog is becoming to be.

Right, I have been rather busy the past week. Well, not really. I spent my first day in my so called new place messaging almost the whole of my contacts list, listening to the radio and sleeping. How interesting.. NOT. Ha-ha, funny thing is, I almost cried of boredom. Not lying, really. I guess having a computer is really an important source, agree? So yeah, did the same thing again and again for the next few days. I'm lucky that I am still schooling cus if not, I'd rot like an apple at home. Geez, it sucks.

Went out to survey my neighbourhood with bestie a couple of days back. Guess what? -.- There's nothing fun or interesting to be involved in here. Of course not including the number of food shops. I feel dead bored living in this place. I hope something or someone will save me.

don't go on reading cus i promise you it's gonna be really boring.

Hmm, I am still re-considering on what subjects to take up next year. But it's probably gonna be (Physics & Bio) + POA + Social Studies & Geog. Damn, i can't take up CPA since majority of my friends are against it. (HAHA) I can say goodbye to Art and DNT :) Oh well, i hope i'll do fine in POA since i'm really not good in Maths. Ahh, bless me.

Fuck, I'm not really in a good mood these days. Screw it. I've been doing alot of thinking. I feel like crying. Cry, cry, cry! So much has happened lately, too much going through on my mind. I feel like starting afresh, turning over a new leaf. Hahaha, go on and laugh at me, suckers. Yada yada, nothing stays as it is forever. To whoever who thinks that i'm refering to him/her, it's your problem. I'm not mentioning names please.

I strongly feel that all of us are going nowhere. Our friendship.. it's falling apart. Do we even mean something to each other now? I don't think so. Do we even think of each other now? Most likely not. We don't talk like the closest of friends anymore. We no longer hang out together. No more. And I.. I feel like i'm being neglected, rejected, not likeable. This is shit, i feel shit. Right. Maybe the problem lies with me, no one else. Hah, i'd guess you guys won't even think i'm talking about y'all if you're reading this. Well, that's good. Maybe it's good if i stop contacting you people. I don't wanna get too involved, yet again. Everything is bringing me down. I don't feel appreciated. What is it about me that is just so wrong? No, i'm not gonna cry. Urgh, fuck fuck fuck fuck all this shits. Urgh!!! I feel like letting it all out.

Fuck, i hate myself. FUCK I NEED A CHILL PILL. FUCK EVERYONE. WHY AM I FUCKING FALLING FOR HIM? FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK WHO THE FUCK AM I. FUCK WILL I EVEN BE NOTICED BY HIM. I AM SUCH A FUCKER. FUCK CHIBAI UH. WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH ME?